Black Men and Mental Health

In light of Mental Health Awareness week, I would like to share a featured post, more for the brothers and for the sisters who wish to understand.

Check it out here!

 

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EVENT – OFNC LONDON Presents: Me and U: A Conversation

My brothers and sisters,

I am happy to announce that I will be amongst a team of panellists discussing all things relationships at the Overseas Fellowship of Nigerian Christians, London Branch!

The talk will feature a panel discussion that addresses topics such as:

Relationship ‘goals’

Love vs Respect

Sexuality and Christianity

Masculinity and Femininity

And many others!

 It is a free event, and you can obtain your tickets now! Donations are also welcome as stated on the Eventbrite link here!

Date: Sunday 18th February 2018

Location: 17 St Mary’s Church, Peckham, SE15 2EA!

Time: 3pm!

See you there!

Tree of Life – Bible Study

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My brothers and sisters,

I’m excited to share with you what I learned when studying the Bible with a man of God, which inspired the initial Tree of Life post. I’ve added a bit more to it and I pray that it will help you understand how much God loves us and how merciful He is to us.

Where to begin? Of course, in the garden of Eden. (Emphasis Added)

Generally, God created the garden, the animals, the fishes and place the First Ones, Adam and Eve in the garden. God instructed Adam not to eat from the tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil and he passed that command onto Eve.

Genesis 1: 29 (ESV): And God said, “Behold, I have given you every plant yielding seed that is on the face of all the earth, and every tree with seed in its fruit. You shall have them for food.

Genesis 2: 8-9 (ESV): And the Lord God planted a garden in Eden, in the east, and there he put the man whom he had formed. And out of the ground the LORD God made to spring up every tree that is pleasant to the sight and good for food. The tree of life was in the midst of the garden and the tree of the knowledge of good and evil.

Genesis 2: 15-17 (ESV): The LORD God took the man and put him in the garden of Eden to work it and to keep it. And the LORD God commanded the man saying, “You may surely eat of every tree in the garden, but of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil you shall not eat, for in the day that you eat of it you shall surely die.

As the event unfolds, Satan deceives Eve and she eats the fruit and gives it to Adam; the start of the Fall. As outlined in Genesis 3: 14-19, God punished the snake by way of a curse, increases Eve’s child pain in childbirth and declares that her desire will be for her husband and declares to Adam the consequences of his disobedience, a cursed ground and the reality of having to work extra hard to eat.

Sidenote: God cursed the snake, not Adam and Eve. God only told them of the reality sin has caused, in the body and in the environment.

God made a declaration in verse 22:

Then the LORD God said, “Behold, the man has become like one of us in knowing Good and evil. Now, lest he reach out his hand and take also of the tree of life and eat and live forever-”
and as verse 23-24 states, sent them out of Eden and placed cherubim and a flaming sword to guard the way to the Tree of Life.

Going back, God had told them that they could eat from any tree in the garden, which INCLUDED the Tree of Life. In Genesis 3:22, God provides the nature of fruit from the Tree of Life, to bestow one with life forevermore; everlasting life. As pointed out in an earlier post, the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil gave Adam and Eve the Knowledge of Good and Evil.

Can we infer the original purpose and intention of God? I believe so! I learned that if Adam and Eve had eaten the fruit of the Tree of Life firstand assuming that they had eaten the fruit of the Knowledge of Good and Evil afterwards, they would be like God indeed, with everlasting life and the ability to handle the Knowledge of Good and Evil just like God Himself, not in a relative fashion which is mankind thinking about Good and Evil from his own perspective.

But this was not so, and God had to push Adam and Eve out to protect the Tree of Life. Again, why? Well, I learned that Adam and Eve were hungry and their hunger reflected an issue of the soul caused by the introduction of sin. They had created capacity within themselves, their soul, and needed to fill it.**

However, as we are aware, this was not so. Adam and Eve were in a state of sin, due to their disobedience. If they were able to obtain access to the fruit of the Tree of Life, then a catastrophic would arise; they would have everlasting life, the knowledge of good and evil coupled with unrepentant sin. 

 Adam and Eve repented, shown by the skin garments God covered them with (Gen 3:21; the first animal sacrifice! Where else did God get skins from? May explain the animal sacrifices later spoke about in the Law, and Hebrews 9:22 provides insight: Indeed, under the law almost everything is purified with blood, and without the shedding of blood there is no forgiveness of sins.) rather than the loincloths they fashioned out of fig leaves (Gen 3: 7), but there was a problem; Adam carried the human race, and the sin affected them as well. Adam could not repent on behalf of the entire human race, but for his own sin.

Your sin effects other people. Read Romans 5: 12-19 for details. 

This is why God made provision to send Jesus, to die on the cross, to remove the innate sin, and to clothe you with righteousness. You have to believe in Jesus to receive the free gift of salvation and righteousness, then comes the renewing of your mind, the process of unlearning and relearning the word of God in its truth and entirety. Once obtained, you can put on the new man, your new identity and live it out with power and confidence.

1 Corinthians 15: 20-22 (ESV): But in fact Christ has been raised from the dead, the firstfruits of those who have fallen asleep. For as by a man came death, by a man has come also the resurrection of the dead. For as in Adam all die, so also in Christ shall all be made alive.

**The soul yearns for something more. The innate sin causes disruption in the soul. Some seek to fill the void by seeking drugs, sex, pornography, exorbitant spending, excessive television, relationships addictions etc. Capacity is created in the soul and a need to fulfil it grows, hence why addictions and reckless living manifests and takes place. The truth is, these will never satisfy you. They are temporary. Once obtained/consumed/indulged, the “benefit” vanishes. But when one fills their soul with Jesus, you create capacity, and your need for Him grows and grows. That’s why he’s satisfying. He always fills the void. 

Thank you for reading, and may God bless you for your diligence in studying His word.

Tunde T. Amao

 

 

 

You vs the World – Part 1

 

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My brothers and sisters.

I would like to share my Bible study notes with you on a topic that we all must have an awareness of.

Who truly runs the world? The politicians? The financiers? The lawyers? The media? The entertainment industry?

No. The one who runs the world is Satan.

THE FALL OF SATAN

Isaiah 14: 12 – 15 (KJV) provides insight around what I call the Event before Creation and explains how and why Satan, previously known as Lucifer, fell from Heaven (Emphasis added).

How art thou fallen from heaven, O Lucifer, son of the morning! How art thou cut down to the ground, which didst weaken the nations! For thou hast said in thine heart, I will ascend into heaven, I will exalt my throne above the stars of God: I will sit also upon the mount of the congregation, in the sides of the north: I will ascend above the heights of the clouds; I will be like the most High. Yet thou shalt be brought down to hell, to the sides of the pit.

Satan wanted to exalt himself above God, a divine crime. God, being all-knowing, sussed out his plan, and cast him out of heaven.

Jesus, being present in the beginning (1 John 1:1), saw this. In fact, he even told the seventy-two disciples he sent out in Luke 10:18 (ESV): 

And he said to them, “I saw Satan fall like lightning from heaven.”

Satan fell and ended up in the garden of Eden, to tempt Eve, (Genesis 3: 1-5) an act which caused reverberations across the earth, the effects we are seeing today. It is often said that Adam and Eve gave up their title of dominion of the world the moment they sinned against God. In fact, it is probably right to say that Satan still wanted to have dominion over something. If he couldn’t have heaven, then he would take the world.

SATAN’S CHARACTER AND ENDGAME

There are many instances where Jesus Himself and Paul talks about the “status” of Satan (as established above) as a result of his fall, as well as his character and his ultimate goal. Below are a few scriptures to illustrate:

Ephesians 2: 2 (ESV) – and you were dead in the trespasses and sins in which you once walked, following the course of this world, following the prince of the power of the air, the spirit that is now at work in the sons of disobedience. 

2 Corinthians 4: 4 (ESV) – In their case the god of this world has blinded the minds of the unbelievers to keep them from seeing the light of the glory of Christ, who is the image of God. 

John 8: 43-44 (ESV) – Why do you not understand what I say? It is because you cannot hear my word. You are of your father the devil, and your will is to do what he desires. He was a murderer from the beginning, and does not stand in the truth because there is no truth in him. When he lies, he speaks out of his own character, for he is a liar and the father of lies. 

John 10: 10 (ESV) – The thief comes only to steal, kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly. 

 Please take heed of the weight behind these scriptures.

THE 1 JOHN 2: 15-17 WARNING

We have all been warned about the influence of the world; practices, viewpoints, improper standards and self-seeking behaviours. In fact, scripture has said that being a friend of the world equates with being an enemy of God. (James 4: 4).

With the knowledge of Satan’s character and his link to the world, 1 John 2: 15-16 (ESV) warns us even further (emphasis added; Also, note 2 Corinthians 4:4):

Do not love the world or the things of the world, the love of the Father is not in him. For all that is in the world – the desires of the fleshthe desires of the eyes and the pride of life – is not from the Father but is of the world.  

This is the battle plan of Satan, he will tempt you with these worldly tools. He used them with Eve in Genesis 3:6-7 (NIV):

You will not certainly die, the snake said to the woman. For God knows that when you eat from it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil. When the woman saw the fruit of the tree was good for food and pleasing to the eye,  and also desirable for gaining wisdom, she took some and ate. She also gave some to her husband, who was with her and he ate it.

Eve had no desire to eat the fruit until Satan came to speak to her. Eve saw that the fruit was good for food, a thought that never came to mind before her encounter with Satan. The pride to become like God and the desire to gain wisdom? Again, that was not present or apparent before her encounter with Satan.

Sidenote: I find it incredibly cheeky considering the circumstances here as Satan said: “For God knows that when you eat from it…”. If this was true, then wouldn’t have God made it clear from the get-go? And look at how he phrased himself, (when you eat from it) as if he had almost anticipated the First Beings eating the fruit, a thought that did not even cross their own mind’s, to begin with!

Also, please remember that this happened before sin entered into the world.

 In other words, Satan’s influence can awaken or identify the desire to. I believe that the “desire to” can be awakened when exposed to external influences.  Rick Warren explains the same point well in his book The Purpose Driven Life:

“…Satan identifies a desire inside of you. It may be a sinful desire, like the desire to get revenge or to control others, or it may be a legitimate, normal desire, like the desire to be loved and valued or to feel pleasure. Temptation starts when Satan suggests (with a thought) that you give in to an evil desire, or that you fulfil a legitimate desire in a wrong way or at the wrong time. Always be aware of shortcuts. They are often temptations!” 

It is the same when we spend time reading and studying the Bible. The desire to know Him awakens.

We have to pay close attention and be wary of the many sources of influence. Is it satanic/worldly or is it godly/righteous?

Once we recognise that the desires of the flesh, eyes, and life are knocking at our door, we have to respond accordingly.  Jesus did it, and so can you!

To find out how, please keep your eyes out for part two.

Tunde T. Amao

The Misconceptions of Man

 

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My brothers,

This topic is very dear to my heart and I could not wait to share this with you. I will explain why in a later post, but earlier I shared that we are going through a crisis in masculinity. There are many reasons that we probably can think of, but I truly believe that at some point, somewhere in our lives we have been deceived.

Yes, there is a crisis, because we as men have been deceived to what masculinity actually is.

We have looked at films, TV shows, discussions amongst our peers and have used that as benchmarks to achieve masculinity.

I will be sharing scripture as well as my own experience, research and from various conversations that I have heard and engaged in. These are the few misconceptions that are prevalent or have come across and I honestly pray that this message will reach the hearts of those who are promoting the misconceptions without even knowing.

MISCONCEPTION #1 – REAL MEN HAVE BEARDS

This is one of the recent trends that I have noted. Beards do have some input in making a guy look more masculine, especially towards the females, (who are probably nodding their heads in agreement) but unfortunately, the appeal towards guys having beards often has a negative backlash when a beard has been cut or removed.

Not to mention men who have found themselves following this trend to grow a beard just to attract women and those who sadly have questioned their own masculinity because they can’t grow a beard.

MISCONCEPTION #2 – REAL MEN ARE 6ft +

During my transition from college to university years where I was reading about male and female communication, I made it my business to obtain the feminine perspective on relationships and the like. The main reason being, that I have been a victim of this point of rhetoric. In fact, I still don’t quite understand this point. Forgive me if I am wrong, but my natural thought towards this area is that women would like to look up to their male and feel protected as they look out for them, and the added height gives them the advantage. Also, the fact that a male who is shorter than an ideal height, or even shorter than her will almost make the female not want to take the male seriously. In other words, the conversation ends when 5 foot something is mentioned…

Whether that is true or not remains to be seen. However, we are all fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139: 13 -16) and made in the image of God Himself (Genesis 1: 27), in other words, males (and females) did not choose the families they were born, the neighbourhoods they grew up in, their body shape or their height.

Men, your height or beard has nothing to do with you being a man. For those who have felt some kind of way because of these misconceptions, let this be a principle to take home:

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Disclaimer: My brothers. This is not a call to escape from responsibility. If you are made to feel a certain way about things that you KNOW you have the capacity to change, then you better do it – quickly! There is strength in the grace of God!

MISCONCEPTION #3 –  MEN HAVE TO “MAN UP”

Lads, you have emotions. You are not called to be lead by them or be controlled by them, but your emotions are indicators of how you are feeling on the inside. It is normal to have and display emotion.

John 11: 35 – Jesus wept.

(The shortest verse in the bible; very memorable and very significant in relation to authentic masculinity.)

Us men, whenever we tend to feel overwhelmed by life, we tend to express our emotions with the one who loves us dearly, our women. It makes sense, to be open and transparent about your frustrations. However, because of our failed relationships, we are afraid to share our emotions or behave like we don’t have any, just to be seen in control from the female’s perspective and to provide ourselves inner comfort to be seen as protecting the relationship.

Of course, that is how we men rationalise it. However, the truth is, you don’t want to share your emotions with your woman because you are afraid of how she may perceive you afterwards. 

Men’s number 1 fear: Being seen as weak in front of their woman and having to deal with the reality that she can choose “stronger” guys out there. 

Then comes the dreaded statement we men have heard, acted upon and discovered that it had caused more harm than good.

“You need to man up!”

We need to recognise that when this sentence is being said, either from men or women, it is usually said out of frustration at the lack of manliness that is almost expected to be displayed.

However, let us be clear on this: anyone who makes you feel less than is probably because they have been led away by general or by their own misconceptions of masculinity themselves.This is where I feel compelled to share statements to both women and to men:

Ladies: Your femininity awakens masculinity. That’s why men become so excited and want to do “manly things” for you. Yes, they make mistakes but don’t make sharp statements out of your frustrations. Trust me on this, but the self-esteem of the man will crumble to a point where they will respond by doing things they think they need to do, just for the sake of doing it, but not from a place of where they actually want to.

Conclusion: The self-esteem of the man is needed to be preserved so that he can be self-confident in responding to the call of man. Attack the self-esteem and you will crumble him to be reactive, not proactive.

Men: True, authentic masculinity is bestowed. Yes, the woman can enable your fire of masculinity to burn within you, but ladies cannot bestow masculinity because they are women. Men bestow masculinity to men (That is why it is important to have a male mentor, a father figure or a good relationship with your earthly fathers). Follow the Way of the Lord, surround yourselves with like-minded men and work so can be ready to answer the call of man. How can you be a man for others when you cannot be a man for yourself

Conclusion: Masculinity comes from within, not from what you do externally. Operate from a place of knowing and focus on being, not doing.

Have you come across any misconceptions that made you think or feel “surely, this can’t be right?” Please feel free to discuss them in the comment section below.

Thank you for reading my brothers, and remember; God created you males because He wants you to become a man through Jesus Christ.

Tunde T. Amao

Men and Women: The Real Relationship – Part 2

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Greetings, brothers and sisters.

We have explored in part one of the model relationship. Now, we’re going to look at the specifics in great detail.

Genesis 2: 24 (NIV) – That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.

This is the foundational scripture that many would use for marriage. Now, pay particular attention to this next point; Marriage is not man-made. It is an institution created by God so that men and women can express their love for each other the way God wanted love to be expressed. As we saw earlier, there is a model, a standard which must be followed for maximum fulfilment in blossoming, loving relationships.

So, why do I say this? If you want a Godly relationship with Godly foundations, you have to do it God’s way; the way He established it and using Godly materials.

Ephesians 5: 31 – 32 (NIV) – For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh. This is a profound mystery, but I am talking about Christ and the church.

The above scripture speaks of the perfect unity of Jesus and the Church (we His people). The marriage relationship or a growing relationship should mirror this exact model. The question now is, what is the relationship between Jesus Christ and the Church, how does it look like and what does it entail? We will look at Ephesians 5: 21 – 27 in greater detail.

EPHESIANS 5: 21 – 27

(Emphasis added and broken down for greater analysis)

Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.

Wives submit yourselves to your own husband as you do to the Lord. For the husband is head of the wife as Christ is head of the church, his body, of which he is the Saviour. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word and to present her to himselfas a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless.

REVERENCE FOR CHRIST AND SUBMISSION

When building anything, the foundation has to be strong enough to hold the extra weight on top. Jesus Christ is the firm foundation (1 Corinthians 3: 11). If one has a sincere reverence for Him, then this aspect will not be a problem. Think about it; would you build ontop of a firm foundation or a shaky one?

Before we touch on the submission aspect, which can ring alarm bells for some, I wanted to touch lightly on this. Submission is not just a biblical woman thing, it applies to men as well.The same way we submit to one another is the same submission that we offer the Lord God Almighty.

In a relationship setting, men who are seeking to become authentic unapologetic men of the Lord God will need to apply their lessons to their submission to God and now tailor that to the chosen lady in their life. There also has to be a healthy boundary as this is more of a process to learn how to submit to their special lady as opposed to the full submission in the context of scripture which is reserved for Husbands and Wives only. Use this opportunity to learn how to submit to her lads!

BE WARNED: HEALTHY BOUNDARIES PROTECT. YOUR BOYFRIEND SHOULD NOT BE LEADING YOU ANYWHERE. YOUR GIRLFRIEND SHOULD NOT BE SUBMITTING TO YOU. THIS IS RESERVED ONLY FOR HUSBANDS AND WIVES.

WIVES SUBMISSION TO HUSBAND

Ladies, as mentioned in the above paragraph and taking what we learnt in the first post into consideration, I’d like to share a small analogy:

Jesus Christ is the husband. The Church is His wife. Imagine you are the Church now, your name is now Church. Jesus is your husband. What do you know about Jesus?

Jesus walks with integrity, loving, forgiving, compassionate and has a no-nonsense attitude when it comes to His Father’s business. Has an epic prayer life, doesn’t deny His emotions, but manages and expresses it appropriately, can protect you, encourage you, has a vision for His life and can lead you to a place He knows you can feel safe, secure and allowed to be who you are meant to be; yourself.

He knows your not perfect; He knows your flaws and loves you because of them and He encourages you gently to be the best version of yourself and will celebrate you along the way. Now, he may correct you in a loving way because He does not delight in anything that disrespects Him or any matter that involves His Heavenly Father and will fight passionately for the matters of God because that is where He gets His strength, worth and identity from. A man who is not ashamed of His Father and will continue to walk His way because He loves God that much.

Would you submit to such a man?

Now imagine a man, who isn’t Jesus, but is striving to have the same qualities, the same mindset, the same emotional disposition as Him. Who is constantly in the Word and can teach and encourage you and sees you for being YOU. He knows He isn’t perfect and will make mistakes from time to time, but knows as long as he follows Jesus, he will be led in the right way.

This is what means to be in submission to a man as on to the Lord. The man must display lord-like qualities, and it must be seen and evidenced, from the inside and out. That’s the man worth submitting to.

HUSBANDS TO LOVE THEIR WIVES

Lads, back to you again.

Jesus Christ gave His life to redeem the Church. He died so that the Church may dwell in the righteousness of Him. He knows that the Church is not perfect, hence why He always teaches the Church to dwell and grow in His Word, where they can find rest, comfort, security and strength.

It is not easy for women. The way the world is set up now, they have to make the extra effort to advance themselves and protect themselves from any hindrances as well as deal with their emotions with or without support. Women are blessed with creativity and the ability to multi-task; once they have a mission, they will complete it. I believe that even when women are tired, they still have to find that inner strength and resolve to push forward to get to where they want to get to.

Imagine juggling so many responsibilities and not feeling appreciated for their efforts.

Men, Jesus Christ died so that the Church can be restored, uplifted and placed on the path of righteousness. Jesus gave His all in the name of love.

My brothers, beware! Look at what scripture says:

Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.

There are alarm bells when a lady claims to love God, claims Christ and does not submit to Him. If she doesn’t submit herself to Him, how much more you?

Benchmark principle: How the male/female submitted to God is a clear indication as to how they can submit to you.

There are so many elements here, but the general message here is that you don’t take away from people you love. As men, respect the advancement of women and continue to add to that so that they may grow in self-confidence, joy and peace When they are tired and weary, be ready and available to step in and to pour love, attention, affection and strength into them so they can rise up and continue on their path towards greatness.

Women are going through battles we have no idea of. Pay attention and love them for who they are. They can only be themselves and you have to recognise and acknowledge that.

I want to stress again that this is in the context of cultivating a successful relationship. This will enable you to discover more about God’s standard in relationships as well as discover more about yourself and the person you’re growing with. Full submission only happens in a marriage relationship.

As women, remember that men also go through battles. They may not speak on them, they may not say due to the resurrection of hurt and pain, or maybe they are afraid of how you will view them afterwards. Some men do what to become the standard where they feel they ought to be, and place pressure on themselves to perform. Truth be told, this pressure they put on themselves, plus the pressure you may have placed on him, the mind can only take so much. Plus, most men do not want to hear about another man’s capabilities, especially that they know within themselves that they are trying and trying very hard.

One cannot, and will not, value full submission if one has not resolved in being willfully submitted to God, through Jesus Christ, first.

I’ve hinted the ladies above (I hope you got it ladies!) and as well as the men, (keep your eyes peeled bro! it’s not all about beauty and favour! (Proverbs 31:30)

Tunde T. Amao

Men and Women: The Real Relationship – Part 1

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Hello, my brothers and sisters.

I had to share this post. So much so, that this will be a three-part series as I would like us to take our time and to make sure that we understand what we are about to explore.

From reading various articles, books and hearing a few sermons and, most importantly reading the Bible, something jumped at me. It made me look at the nature of relationships differently. It is counter-cultural and to be honest, it is expected; we are talking about Kingdom principles here.

In short, we have lost sight of what a real relationship between man and woman looks like; the way the Lord God, the God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob, has created and established.

I will be painting a picture. All I ask is for the Holy Spirit to move and to help me teach this foundational principle.

Let us begin.

THE TRINITY

The Trinity is very difficult to describe. The Lord has revealed Himself in three, but He is One. Make no mistake, and place particular attention to what I write next: We serve one God. The One who created the Earth. The Everlasting Father; The God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob. He has revealed Himself, in three; God the Father, God the Son and God the Holy Spirit.

The closest (not exact, but close) example we can use is water. Water comes in three forms; Water as a liquid (drinking water), solid (ice) and gas (vapour). These are three forms of water, but they are still water, just in different states.

I say it is a close example because God doesn’t come in three states, which imply three individual separate beings of matter. God revealed himself in three, but He is One. He is ONE and we serve One God.

God has revealed himself in this manner as we see in Scripture (emphasis added) :

Genesis 1: 2 (NIV) – In the Beginning, God created the heavens and the earth. Now the earth was formless and empty, darkness was over the surface of the deep, and the Spirit of God was hovering over the water.

John 1: 1 (NIV) – In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. He was with God in the beginning.

The “He” is referred to the Word. Who is the Word you say?

John 1: 14 (NIV) – The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the one and only Son, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth.

We have the Father, the Son; Jesus, and God’s Spirit; the Holy Spirit revealed. The perfect unity. God revealed in three; One God.

ADAM AND EVE

As we see in the Book of Genesis, God created the world, the animals and then mankind. Please notice something here; with everything God created (and saw that it was good), there is ONE thing that God saw that was not good: the fact that Man was alone.

Genesis 2: 18 (NIV) – The Lord God said, ‘It is not good for man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.’

God loves us. He loves us all. The Bible declares that God is love in 1 John 4: 8: Whoever does not love, does not know God because God is love. In a nutshell, God being love created mankind so He could express that love to us. God expressed that love by Creating man. Seeing that man was made in His image and harbours His qualities, the fact that Adam did not have anything to express his love to is why God created Eve from Adam.

God reached into His Spirit and Created man. He placed the spirit of man into the Male. God saw that the male did not have anything to love, so just like He pulled the spirit of man out of Himself, God pulled out the Male’s rib and used it to create the Female, being the object of the males love, just like God made man (the spirit) the object of His love. The spirit is both in Males and Females because ultimately the Spirit came from Him.

This is why in the deepest areas in the heart of Men wishes for a Woman to pour out his love to her. This is why in the deepest areas in the heart of Women, wishes to be loved by a man.

But look around you. In the name of finding love, many people have gone through terrible ordeals. I don’t need to mention it, you have gone through, or know of someone who had gone through something terrible. Hearts are being broken and are being broken again and again and again. Lust has crept into the hearts of mankind and many people are feeling drained and constantly tired of having their love thrown away or not being reciprocated.

Look at the Trinity. Look at how God in His love had created man and out of man, woman. There is a process, a pattern, a shape; a model.

A real relationship isn’t between two people.

It’s between three.

[Part two]

Tunde T. Amao